Thursday, November 18, 2010

Achievement Pending: INDEPENDENCE pt 2.

So i have FINALLY got a job. Im a check out chick at Northside plaza. WOOT.

Step one is complete.

I bought a tin the other day For my car fund. It has CAR FUND written on it, in big bold letters lol. So it cannot be missed.

Ive decided to give myself a hundred dollar taxi limit, for the just in case situations. Cus there might be a few of them.

Driving lesson on thursday.

and finally....Resigned up at the gym. YEEHAA.

This is where I am in my life. I wouldnt say its coming to plan. Because I dont plan. I decide what I am going to do, and I do it. Best way to live.

Tuesday, October 26, 2010


my mind has been made up. this is the last choice i will give my self. If i chose one, or the other, i have to stick to it. Chopping and changing my mind every ten minutes HAS TO STOP.

I will give in.

I will forgive, and forget

I will learn to take it. Because thats what sacrifice is.

But its not fair.

you dont sacrifice for me.



to break, or not to break.

I guess i have to make the decision sooner or later.

Do i want to lose the greatest thing in my life.

Do i want a family more then him.

Am i better off alone.

what do i do :(

Monday, October 25, 2010


I love fast-food. I am the first to admit. Biting into a Bacon burger from Red rooster, or a Quater pounder from macca's is amazing... well except for it going straight onto my thighs and hips.

But do we really need 4 McDonalds, 3 KFCs, 2 Domino's pizza, 4 subways (yes i know that subway is healthy)2 Red Roosters, the list goes on...

Why do we need so many? Why did shopping fair need a kfc and maccas in the food court? what was wrong with the place's that where there? I personally always shop at PULP sandwich bar. yes its nice to have them, there, in the air-conditioning to have lunch while shopping, but why was it a necessity?

and why are we building a McDonalds OUT THE FRONT OF shopping fair, when there is one INSIDE of shopping fair?

This is getting ridiculous. You dont need to eat fast food all the time, thats why there is Woolworths, Food works, IGA, Coles.

If you cannot get to a McDonalds or a KFC or a Hungry jacks straight away, there is nothing wrong with waiting. you might even feel a bit better about yourself if you ate a home cooked dinner. or a salad sandwich for lunch.

who knows, the love handles may disappear.

Sunday, October 24, 2010

Bonds. and such

B is putting me on the lease.... so if we break up, he cannot kick me out. SO reliving. So now i feel free to be able to do my garden and buy furniture and yeah. IM JUST HAPPY about that. xo

Thursday, October 21, 2010

Achievement Pending: INDEPENDENCE

I feel so independent. Catching the buses to town and back again, not having to rely on anyone at all. I'd say Achievement Unlocked, but I still need B emotionaly. Its what im working on to fix. So I dont need him at all. I want to want him, not want to need him. Once i start working, i'll be spending my own money, doing my own things and what not. Its hard to trust. i dont know why. I mean, I trust him, but not anyone else. He tells me every time we have a "talk" that i always bring up, about him and other girls. he tells me that its not him. Its not what he wants to do. Why can I not believe him. Its driving me insane.

Some days, I think maybe i should leave. But i feel so comfy with my life. I feel content with him. i dont know. Its all so confusing.

rainy weather day

I am soo drained today. I met up with all of my friends at different times today. lol. was scary freaky. Though I did get to bottle feed K and Z's new baby. It was GREAT. first time in doing that. I felt clucky all over again. Though I cannot have a baby right now, As my partner doesnt want one, I will wait for three years. Then i will have one. I have decided. If he still doesnt want one then, im gunna have to leave. Its the hard reality of it all.

So i start work on saturday. IM SO EXCITED. i havnt been this excited for anything. I hope tomorrow goes REALLY REALY REALLY fast.

awh. I had the best day. And i hope my night gets better.

NOW for a shower. xox